I am a new human. I will do terrible things.

Curse for a Conceited CuntSometimes you would just LOVE for someone to stop talking, or to make talking incredibly painful for them. Or to lose their voice. Because goodness, I can think of a few people whose voice I would love to not hear, can’t you?Well the first thing you will want to do is make one or two of these:http://peepswitch.tumblr.com/post/44071666589/accidental-discovery-alert-i-tried-to-make-theTo represent the target’s tongue. 
Or if you don’t have time… a slice of red bell pepper will do nicely.
What do you do with it? Ooooh… rather a lot of things. But there’s a little more preparation in this one so please hold the applause…Set a pot of vinegar on burner and add a chile pepper and a section of garlic to it. Set to simmer.While the pepper and garlic are infusing, take a piece of black thread and wind it around the ‘tongue.’ Then take cotton balls or a cotton cloth and wrap that around the tongue as well. This will give the recipient a feeling of drymouth, which is so very uncomfortable. Wrap this in black thread as well. Fold a piece of fabric in half and slip the tongue into it. The fabric will then represent the mouth. Sew it up, using the sloppiest but most secure stitches you can handle to seal the victim’s lips. If you have something of the victim’s, this would be the place to put it in. Take the vinegar infusion off the burner and let it cool. Using strait pins, safety pins, needles, nails, and anything you can find that’s spiky, poke holes in the mouth so that they understand that their words… well their words fucking hurt. Stab it as many times as you feel necessary. Which might be an awful lot, considering what they’ve said. Fill a bottle halfway with the vinegar infusion. Add black pepper, maybe gunpowder if you’ve got it. Broken glass also works. Drop the ‘mouth’ into the bottle, so that every word they nearly breathe stings along the wounds you’ve made in their skin. Seal it. Shake it up because every little cuntcanoe needs their world shaken once in awhile. Oh yes, and all of this should be done with intent. If you want this person to stay away from you, throw that thing as far as humanly possible. If you can’t keep them out of their life because they’re family and they LIVE RIGHT DOWN THE STREET, keep the bottle handy and give it a good shake whenever there’s a family gathering. This has been a curse. Enjoy! View Larger

Curse for a Conceited Cunt

Sometimes you would just LOVE for someone to stop talking, or to make talking incredibly painful for them. Or to lose their voice. Because goodness, I can think of a few people whose voice I would love to not hear, can’t you?

Well the first thing you will want to do is make one or two of these:
http://peepswitch.tumblr.com/post/44071666589/accidental-discovery-alert-i-tried-to-make-the

To represent the target’s tongue.

Or if you don’t have time… a slice of red bell pepper will do nicely.


What do you do with it? Ooooh… rather a lot of things. But there’s a little more preparation in this one so please hold the applause…

Set a pot of vinegar on burner and add a chile pepper and a section of garlic to it. Set to simmer.

While the pepper and garlic are infusing, take a piece of black thread and wind it around the ‘tongue.’ Then take cotton balls or a cotton cloth and wrap that around the tongue as well. This will give the recipient a feeling of drymouth, which is so very uncomfortable. Wrap this in black thread as well.

Fold a piece of fabric in half and slip the tongue into it. The fabric will then represent the mouth. Sew it up, using the sloppiest but most secure stitches you can handle to seal the victim’s lips. If you have something of the victim’s, this would be the place to put it in.

Take the vinegar infusion off the burner and let it cool.

Using strait pins, safety pins, needles, nails, and anything you can find that’s spiky, poke holes in the mouth so that they understand that their words… well their words fucking hurt. Stab it as many times as you feel necessary. Which might be an awful lot, considering what they’ve said.

Fill a bottle halfway with the vinegar infusion. Add black pepper, maybe gunpowder if you’ve got it. Broken glass also works.

Drop the ‘mouth’ into the bottle, so that every word they nearly breathe stings along the wounds you’ve made in their skin. Seal it.

Shake it up because every little cuntcanoe needs their world shaken once in awhile.

Oh yes, and all of this should be done with intent.

If you want this person to stay away from you, throw that thing as far as humanly possible. If you can’t keep them out of their life because they’re family and they LIVE RIGHT DOWN THE STREET, keep the bottle handy and give it a good shake whenever there’s a family gathering.

This has been a curse. Enjoy!



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